Thursday is usually my Friday

I am usually off on Fridays but tomorrow I have to come in for a couple of hrs after my eye dr appt. We have a new pt that started on Wednesday while I was working in another clinic and apparently this pt is VERY sexually inappropriate with staff. My boss wants me to come in and sit on the clinic floor during this dude's treatment to observe and step in if necessary. Soemitmes being a SW isn't all it's cracked up tp be :-p

Well, I am on CD 17 and still no positive OPK. I am starting to think that maybe I don't ovulate. I know that I can make eggs-I've seen them on ultrasound-but maybe they don't drop or my ovary doesn't catch them. That would really suck if that's the case b/c that means we move directly to IVF which means a bigger chance of having a litter of children. We really don't want a litter, just on or two at a time would be great :-)

P got 2 unit coins today! I am so proud of him. His CSM and another higher up gave him the coins due to him passing Ranger School with no recycles and only having a few days to prepare for the school. This unit has really been the best thing that's ever happened to us as far as the Army and P's career. I hate the town but definitely love the unit and love the fact that my hubby is getting the respect that he has earned.

I guess it's time for an update

Wow, I haven't been on here in forever!!! Our laptop is kaput and blogging on my iPhone is definitely not the easiest thing but I have figured out that work doesn't block this site-WOOHOO!!!!!!! I've also decided to not only talk about the Army life but also TTC while in the Army.

Well, we still live in Suckville, LA but we definitely have plans to move from here. We have pretty much decided that we want to go to Ft. Campbell. P says that the 101st the only regular Army unit that he wants to be a part pf b/c they are the most squared away. Of course I know that will mean at least one deployment while we are there but I know that he wants to deploy again before getting back into the Spec Ops world. I don't know when this PCS will occur but I know that he wants to stay here a few more months to go to more schools and learn more things.

We are almost at the 21 month mark with TTC. We are trying OPKs, Metformin and Letrozole for this cycle and the following 2 cycles. If we don't get pregnant then I will have laparoscopic surgery to see what's going on in my body. Hopefully we won't have to get to that point but if we do then we do. I just hope that we don't end up with a litter. Twins would be fine but more than that and I would probably have a nervous breakdown.

The Metformin helps with insulin resistance (part of my dealing with PCOS) and the Letrazole stimulates estrogen output. I take the Letrozole CD 5-9 and during those days it inhibits estrogen production. After I stop taking my body super produces estrogen (and hopefully eggs) in an attempt to make up for the days it wasn't producing. I am now on CD 16 and day 5 of fighting nausea, one of the wonderful side effects. There have been times in the past few days that I thought I would not be able to make it through the day without hurling!!!

Let me also share the joy of OPKs and peeing in a cup. I never thought that I would pee i na cup so much in my life!!! I opted for the dip strip OPKs rather than the stick kind because of cost. Well I get my best reading around noon so I have to take the strip and the cup to work and do it there!!! So yeah, I pee in a cup at least once a day, CD 10-whenever AF comes or I get a positive OPK. I've become quite the expert now, LOL!

Thankfully TriCare has been covering all of the costs (except OPKs and HPTs)thus far and will continue to cover the vast majority of the cost. We are so ready to be parents and every month we anxiously wait to see if AF shows up or not. Wonderful friends have already given some boy clothes to us and I have already started to buy burp clothes, books and little things here and there. I've been looking at nursery bedding and accessories as well and I have definitely decided that I want a modern looking nursery. P and I have also looked at some of the cutest punk baby clothes and I can't wait to dress our little one in some super cute clothes! For so long I wouldn't allow myself to really think about being a mom b/c I was scared of the disappointment and scared of becoming depressed while TTC. Now I have come to embrace the fact that we will somehow become parents and I am getting excited!!!

And yes, we have a boy name picked out and are working on a girl name. . . and no I won't share the names b/c I don't want anyone to steal them :-p

Hurricane Gustav and Ranger School

This time last week I was getting ready to evacuate due to Gustav. We weren't ordered to evacuate but my neighbors were gone, my hubby was gone and I didn't want to be stuck here with no power by myself. I packed and cleaned and then headed to Ft. Hood, TX on Sunday. My wonderful friend, Sara, was kind enough to let my zoo and I stay with her :-) The kicker was that we had never met IRL until I got to her home. We met online at a great message board (www.armywifechat.com) and became friends. Staying with her and her zoo (2 kittens and 3 dogs) was AWESOME and I can't wait to go back. I also met many other women who I also knew from the message board. I really hated leaving the Hood area b/c it was so nice to be around friends.

My husband is still in school and I miss him terribly. We have such a great marriage and are so blessed that rather than fight/argue when we're apart, we appreciate each other more and truly become closer. I can't wait to have him home with me.

Too damn hot and super fleas

I am sick of the heat. It is just too hot here. . . way hotter than it was in Savannah. Apparently the heat and everything else here has made the local fleas damn near invincible. We are currently treating Chloe (lab/pit mix) for fleas b/c she is allergic to them. . . she's quite pitiful but is doing better. We keep flea treatment on our furbabies and we bath the dogs every month but apparently these Cajun fleas are tough to kill. Just one more reason I hate this place.

Seriously, Ft. Richardson is looking like a great option right now.

Our 4th of July

Can I just say that although I was dreading the whole "hanging out at the lake with soldiers" plan, I actually had a great time! Soldiers+alcohol+fireworks=crazy times :-p My hubby along with his friend Bobby made 2 bombs out of the fireworks and set them off in the sandy area next to where we were. The first one was made in a plastic water bottle and it made some pretty fireworks. For the next one, they stepped it up a notch and filled a Corona bottle with fireworks powder. . . that was one loud freaking blast!!! After it exploded, they came back up the hill for beer and to light more fireworks. All of a sudden LH (another soldier) starts saying "fire, there's a fire!" Our boys had started quite a fire out there; thankfully there were plenty of them who knew what to do and we did NOT burn down the forest :-) There were alot of other people out there shooting fireworks so we had quite a nice display. After we left the lake we went to LH's place on post and hung out with him, another soldier and Mary, a fellow Army wife. All in all it was a very good night.

Need to move from this place

I realized today, while watching What Not to Wear, that I seriously don't care about clothes any more. . . . and that is not a good thing. I wear scrubs to work and workout clothes on the weekend (b/c we have been going to the gym). We rarely go out and when we do, who cares if you have cute fashionable clothes when everyone does their clothes shopping at WalMart? I haven't shopped for clothes since we've been here b/c there's not a damn store worth anything within an hour and a hlaf of this hell hole. I'm gonna need Stacey and Clinton when we move b/c I won't have a clue how to dress cute by the time we get out of here.

We have seriously got to get out of this place. I can't take it.

A good, no great, day at Polk

Preston and I have found a way to work out together-the rock wall at Wheelock. We both love it and we can do it together :-) We do it and the tread wall together about 3-4 times per week. I love it!!!! We had tried running together but he is so much faster than I am so he never got a good workout. He is teaching me better rock climbing skills and we actually plan to take some rock climbing trips and get our own gear :-)

After our great workout, I got a great haircut! I went to French Quarter Day Spa and my girl did a great job. I am so happy b/c I thought I'd have to drive at least an hour for a good haircut. She's also a fellow Army wife so I love being able togive her some business.

We also went to lunch, got the oil changed in the Tahoe and then walked the dogs. . . . so we have had quite a productive day! Now we are looking online for furniture, planning a trip to CA and chilling out with our furbabies. Yeah, it has been a great day! I love long weekends :-)

It's official. . . . (big fat tantrum-enter at your own risk)

I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo over this place. I got my newest edition of Southern Living today and of course there were articles about GA and, of course, Jekyll Island-a place that I still want to visit. I am sick and tired of watching out for coyotes and snakes when I my dogs in the back of our townhome. I am tired of not being able to window shop anywhere except WalMart. I know, I know-I'm a whiney brat and yes, we did find a fun Mexican place but I want to be out of here so badly.

I am sick of my wonderful husband (he truly is wonderful) asking me if everything's ok. . . not it's not freaking ok! I took a paycut, BAH went down, child support (for a child we never see) went up and I can only find a part time job because the job market here sucks. I mean, my job in Savannah was not the best and I was looking to leave it but at least we didn't have to worry about paying bills. . . . and I loved it there.

UGH! I pray that we only stay here a year. . . if not I might go crazy.

Leesville is still not growing on me

I haven't blogged in a while b/c I haven't had anything nice to say. People have told me that this area will grow on me but it hasn't and I don't see it ever growing on me. It looks like we can leave here in 2009 but with the Army it's always a guessing game. I don't like to admit it but being here in this place has affected my mood for the worse. I am taking it out on Preston which does not help our relationship at all. I just started Wellbutrin so that I can quit smoking but I am hoping that it will have a positive effect on my mood as well.

I have to say that I do like the post, just wish there was more on it. We went to Alligator Lake last weekend and took our dogs. We tried to fish but didn't catch anything, most likely due to the fact that our dogs are rambunctious and were jumping in the water! We are going to MayFest tomorrow and plan to look at old cars, maybe eat some food and I definitely plan to take pictures.

I can say that I like BJACH and my PCM. I went there this week and I love Dr. Baruti and was very pleased with the service at the hospital as well as the clealiness of the place. Over the next couple of weeks I will have some testing, as will Preston, and then we'll go from there.

Eh-there's not really anything else to say except that I hope and pray our next post is better.

Lorelei's Myspace and Lorelei's website

http://www.marriedtothearmy.com/lorelei.htm <-----Lorelei's website
http://www.myspace.com/lovelittlelorelei <------Lorelei's Myspace page

Please help us to help this wonderful little girl!

Please help Lorelei and pass the word!

Since I started dating Preston, I met many wonderful Army wives and girlfriends who have become dear friends of mine. They have helped me so much over the past 2 years and now one of them needs help and support.

Lorelei's has HLHS, Hypoplastic left heart syndrome which is a rare congenital heart defect in which the left side of the heart is severely underdeveloped. In babies with HLHS, the aorta and left ventricle are very small, and the aortic and mitral valves are either too small to allow sufficient blood flow or are atretic (closed) altogether. As blood returns from the lungs to the left atrium, it must pass through an atrial septal defect to the right side of the heart.

In a healthy human, the left side of the heart receives oxygen-rich blood from the lungs and pumps it out to the rest of the body; with these structures underdeveloped, they cannot circulate blood to other organs, and the right ventricle must pump blood to both the lungs, as it would normally, and to the rest of the body, a situation which cannot be sustained for long.In cases of HLHS, the right side of the heart often must pump blood to the body through a patent ductus arteriosus. As the ductus arteriosus usually closes within eleven days after birth, blood flow is severely restricted and eventually cut off, leading to dangerously low circulation and eventually to shock.Without treatment, HLHS is fatal, but with intervention, an infant may survive.

Lorelei's parents received great news a few weeks ago that Lorelei should be able to have the open heart surgery that she needs in June. However, right after that, they were dealt a blow. Some of Lorelei's meds are considered to be experimental and therefore insurance has decided not to cover them. In addition, there is a certain prescription for RSV that is typically not given to children past age 2. Because of Lorelei's condition, she has needed to continue on it beyond the recommended guidelines. But this too was also denied. They were sent a bill for nearly $40,000 to be paid within 14 days. Obviously they don't have that kind of money. They have tried to appeal and have contacted all of the resources that they know of at this point. So far, nothing seems to be panning out.

Lorelei is also on a special diet and has to have four bottles of Pediasure (or an equivalent) each day. This alone is $300/month. She also has to have several medications that used to be prescriptions but are now OTC, such as Zyrtec. Since they are over the counter, the cost is much more per month. Just the co-pays for her prescriptions are more than $200/month. When she goes for her surgery in June, there is a medication that she has to have in order to survive. The medication is given every four hours and is $7,000/dose. Insurance has informed them that this medication will not be covered; because of the type of surgery she is having, they could be facing a very long hospital stay. There is a Ronald McDonald house that is available but that is not without cost either, not to mention travel expenses, meals, etc.

Lorelei's parents would never come out and ask for any help, but our "group" wants to do whatever we can to help. I can't imagine the position her family has been put in where they are basically being told to choose massive financial burden or their daughter's life. Of course, they will choose Lorelei over everything else but it would be wonderful if all of their effort and emotions could be focused on her rather than worrying and stressing about the financial side of it all.

Any ideas of a fundraiser or something we could do to help would be great. Small things could make a difference - clipping coupons for Zyrtec (liquid form) and Pediasure, etc. Also if you know of any resources that can help with medical financial need that would be incredible as well. Some of you may know of something that we haven't yet run across.

Donations can be sent to via paypal to: stacey@marriedtothearmy.com. Please be sure that it is noted that it is for Lorelei.

Soldier killed in training

Last night my DH got a call that formation would be about 45 minutes earlier this morning. His SGT didn't say why and no one seemed to know why. When he came home after PT I asked him about the early formation-it was because a soldier in their unit was killed last night in a normal training exercise. Killed in training. . . that's not supposed to happen. He wasn't in a helicopter or even in a combat training. He was driving a big truck like thing that flipped and landed on him. We're not supposed to have to worry about our men when they leave for 'regular' Army work in the morning. . . we're supposed to worry about them when they are deployed.

It was just such a reality check for me. I can't imagine his wife's reaction. I would have been in total denial. I would have been screaming, "No, you must be wrong. MY husband was just doing normal driving training. He's not deployed. This is not supposed to happen." I pray everyday that I never hear that knock at the door, see that car in my driveway or see those men at my front door.

Starting a new job

I have been busy for the past few days; learning my way around my new job. I am now a nephrology social worker and have no background in it at all. I applied for this job and wanted this job. . . but now that I got it I am starting to feel overwhelmed. My background is in child welfare social work-I have done it for 7 years. Over the past year I became very disillusioned with the child welfare system and decided that PCSing would be a great time for a career change. . . . no I am not so sure.

I work at a dyalisis clinic (2 clinics, actually) and until now I have really not known anything about dialysis. I knew that it was used by those with ESRD (end stage renal disease) but I didnt know anything else about it. Now I have to learn about Medicaid, Medicare, private insurance and all of the medical terms that go along with it. I will also be dealing with death on a regular basis; the clinic where I am training lost 3 patients it the past week! I talked with my friend, Beth (also a social worker) about it and she reminded me that I am capable of learning new things and recommended that I do some nephrology research online, which I am definitely gonna do. Well, I wanted a challenge. . . guess I got it!

DH (dear husband) and I have also come to the realization that we must make some major changes to the way we spend money. For the next few months there will be NO eating out and NO spending on anything but needs. Thankfully my new emplyer will issue scrubs to me so I wont need to buy work clothes which will save us money. There's also not alot, actually not anything, fun to do in this town so we arent tempted to go out and spend. Usually we spend money on DVDs, alcohol, junk food, etc but that is all about to change. We've also decided to change our dogs from the expensive dog food to a less expensive brand. Hopefully we can dig ourselves outta this hole by this time next year.

I am exhausted right now so I apologize if spelling or punctuation isnt great. I have been getting up with DH and walking our dogs for 45 minutes every morning this week. It's great for my health and the dogs' health but I am definitely not used to it. Next week I will start adding yoga to my morning exercise routine so that I can get toned and flexible again :-) Ok, I think that it's now time for hot tea and bed. Nighty-night!

I want a do over

That's right, I said it. I want a DO OVER!!!! *stomping my feet like a child* I want to go home and home for me is Savannah, GA. No, I did not grow up there and I lived there less than 2 years but it was home. From the moment I stepped foot in that city I felt at home. It is full of history and there is always something to do there. The Historic District, with all it's squares and homes, is beautiful and unique. The beach was not far from Savannah and we loved spending time there, too.

On weekends when we were home, we'd take the dogs for long walks at Skidaway Island or in the Historic District and downtown. We had so many great local restaurants that we never had the chance to try. We had our bar where we made many friends. We had our regular Mexcan joint and regular Chinese place. I had a great hair stylist and had found a wonderful chirch. I had even started doing my photography again. . . .

Now we're here in Fort Polk, LA and living in Leesville, LA. I like the townhome that we rent but I hate this city. That's right I hate it here. I have been putting on a brave face and have remained pretty postive about everything but it all hit me today. There is nothing to do-and I mean NOTHING! The Army post is nice and there's a 10 mile paved trail on it but that's about it. Oh yeah, there's a WalMart and a catfish place, too. My new job is about 30 min away in a neighboring town that is a little bigger, but still nothing good there either. To actually get to a mall, we have to drive to Alexandria. I did like Lake Charles when I went there (I will be training there for my new job) but it's an hour and a half away. It was definitely my fave city that I have seen here.

I want a DO OVER and I don't want to be here. Sometimes the Army makes me so mad! Why couldn't they have put him Ft. Stewart? Why couldnt they have put him on a post with an actual decent size city near it! They say that 'Home is where the Army sends you' but I don't think that I will ever feel at home in Leesville. Usually I would be unpackedby now and have pictures on the wall, but there are still boxes and there are only a couple of pics on the wall. It just feels like this is a temporary stop, not like it's a home for us.

All of this started because I was looking at coffe table book of historic Savannah today. It really hit me, we don't live there any more. I don't get to shop on Broughton St or take the dogs to River Street any more. We don't get to drive 40 to Tybee Island any more. Damnit-I am getting teary eyed. I hate not being there. I want to go home.

A glimpse into the life of an Army wife

I guess that I should post a little introduction of sorts. I am Becca (31) and I am married to an Army soldier, Preston (24) and we are stationed at Ft. Polk, LA. We recently moved here from Savannah, GA. . . it was a definite culture shock. I still miss Savannah and the friends that I made there; in fact, I get teary eyed a few times a week just thinking about it. I even found myself referring to Savannah as 'home' the other day. As an Army wife, I have had to realize that now, home is where the Army sends us. We are a family, a team and WE are what makes a location home. The Army does not care that I loved Savannah and felt at home the first day that I set foot in the city. The Army does not care that I cried thousands of tears when I learned where our next duty station was. This is my life-moving to locations that I do not get to choose. Wow-it looks scary when I word it that way. Every couple of yrs or so, we will get orders to move somewhere and we basically have no choice in the matter-scary but exciting at the same time.

I have come to realize that it takes a special kind of woman to be a military wife. I am not saying that we are better than other wives; we just must have certain traits and skills. We have to be independent because often times our men are away due to deployments, trainings or hardship tours. We must be able to constantly adapt to new surroundings and circumstances. We must be able to relinquish control of our lives, to a degree, to the military. We must leave family and friends behind whenever we get orders to move. Rather than 'in person friends', at times we must rely on other means of support. We have to be able to reconcile, with our men and us. what they do when they are at war. For some, it's not as difficult. . . . for others, they have seen and much that they do not want to discuss. At times we have to deal with PTSD, which is neither easy nor fun. I have seen PTSD tear apart marriages. Thankfully, it did not tear apart our marriage.

I have also found support in a wonderful message board-armywifechat.com. I joined the board shortly after I met my husband and I have made lifelong friends on there. It is wonderful to be able to login and know that these women know exactly what I am going through at any given time. I have met some of them in person and have made many lifelong friends on there. It is wonderful to know that no matter where we move, I will already have friends on that Army post.

Through my blog, I will give you insight into what life is like for an Army wife. I will be honest, forthcoming and I will even talk about the bad stuff. I love my life and I love my husband but I would definitely change a few things if I could. . . but I'll talk about that in future blogs.